Why not turn silence into opportunity for capitalism?

I was reading a post over at the Peoria Chronicle about how the city council bought a timer that cost $2675.00. This is supposed to help more strictly enforce the five minute rule for those wishing to address the council. They also started a new practice. In order to speak at the meeting you have to arrive early and fill out a card. Now anybody with half a brain can tell that these new implementations do not encourage people to address the council but only make it that much more discouraging. But I have 2 ideas that could be tried when addressing the council next.
1) When you are done addressing the council, whip out your $14.00 Pampered Chef egg timer (already pre-set to five minutes nonetheless) and give them five minutes to respond.

Or, I like this idea better.

2) Wrangle up 5-10 homeless people and have them stand in line for you. They will get your card and fill it out for you. When you arive get their cards and give them some $$. You could have anywhere from 25-50 consecutive minutes to address the council. For the price of 5-10 value meals from McDonalds you can talk to the council. You get to voice your concerns and a few homeless souls get a free meal. But wait, once the homeless people realize that they can eliminate the middle man, they can just go on there own free will and get all of the cards. Then they can sell them for fair market value.
"You want five minutes? That'll be $15.....no checks."

or

"I don't have 2 consecutive 5 minute slots but I can give you 8:35pm and 9:15pm at a reduced price."

Don't you just love capitalism?!?!